Help! I volunteered and I can’t get out

Has this ever happened to you? You volunteer for a small role with an organization. You do a few shifts, then the leader asks if you can take on a few extra tasks.

Then a few more and within a year, you’re serving on the board of directors or leading an entire project and you feel like you can’t get out. It’s like being sucked into a black hole.

Here’s another question. Have you ever been the one asking for more from a volunteer? If you have, you’re not alone. It’s easy to do. An enthusiastic new recruit joins. They’re reliable, capable and fun to have around. So you ask them to do a bit more. Then a bit more. They keep saying yes and you can’t find anyone else you can count on, so you turn a blind eye to the fact that they don’t seem as enthusiastic.

What started as a simple offer to help snowballs into an overwhelming responsibility. The problem? Many organizations unintentionally make it hard to say “no.”

“Fatima” signed up to help at a charity book sale for just one morning. She sorted books, took payments and enjoyed the feeling of making a difference. Then someone asked if she could help the next weekend as they were short-handed. Of course, she said yes. Fast forward five years—she’s now chairing the annual sale, training new volunteers and receiving emails at midnight about book donations. And she is swearing to herself she will never volunteer for anything ever again.

Why do volunteers feel like they can’t get out?

Many times it’s because organizations— usually unintentionally—create a culture where stepping back feels hard. Here’s how:

1. The compliment trap – “You’re so good at this! We don’t know what we’d do without you!” While meant as appreciation, this kind of praise can make volunteers feel irreplaceable — and trapped.

2. The guilt trip – “If you leave, we’ll never find anyone to replace you.” It’s easy to see how this kind of language discourages volunteers from stepping back. Or new people from stepping forward.

3. The gradual creep – A volunteer signs up for one small task, then another, then a committee and before they know it, they have a new unpaid career. And no one told them that it’s okay to say no.

4. The “no-one-else-is-available” dilemma – When recruitment is weak, a few committed volunteers end up doing everything, making them feel like they can’t leave.

Here’s how you can prevent volunteers from feeling trapped.

If you want to retain volunteers long-term, and make it feel safe for new people to volunteer, it’s crucial to create an environment where everyone can contribute without feeling like they’re being sucked into a black hole.

• Be clear about expectations from the start.

When recruiting volunteers, be specific about time expectations. Clear time boundaries prevent volunteers from accidentally overcommitting. They also remind you not to exceed those boundaries.

• Make it OK to step back.

Make it clear that the time they volunteer with you will be, within limits, under their control. Let volunteers know it’s okay to take breaks or move on. That no one will make them feel guilty or uncomfortable for that choice. When someone steps back, celebrate their contribution rather than lamenting their departure.

• Build succession plans.

Ensure that no role becomes so dependent on one person that you feel it couldn’t be done if they left. Cross-train volunteers, and document all procedures.

• Check in with volunteers regularly.

Ask them how they’re feeling about their role. A simple “Are you still enjoying this?” can open the door for honest conversations and prevent burnout before it happens. It’s OK to ask if they want to take on more, just don’t phrase it in such a way that they feel they have to agree.

What if you’re not asking them to do more? If your volunteers are feeling overextended, and it’s not because you’re adding to their task list, it may have something to do with your roles.

Encourage micro-volunteering. Not everyone has time for a long-term role. Short opportunities allow people to contribute without feeling trapped. It also lets them “test the waters” with your organization before diving into a committed role.

Look at splitting up a large role into two or more smaller ones. Sometimes a single role can be too much just in itself. Can it be split between two or more volunteers, or can some of the specific tasks be taken off and done by a micro-volunteer?

And if there are just not enough volunteers for the necessary tasks, it’s time to double-down on your recruitment efforts.

I know, that’s easier said than done. But it’s better to recruit for a few extra positions than it is to recruit for all of them because the current volunteers burnt out and quit.

It’s under your control.

If the volunteers in your organization feel like they’ve been sucked into a black hole, or that they’ve volunteered and can’t get out, take a close look at what you’re asking them to do, and how you’re asking.

Have you allowed yourself to ask that superstar volunteer for more than they want to contribute? Do you use language that might make them feel guilty about refusing? Are your roles small enough they overwhelm someone?

If a volunteer feels trapped, you have to be the one to help them out.

This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.