The Happiness Connection  

Making amends with ends

I have just finished writing in my journal for today. My book only has a few empty pages left. It is almost time to start a new one.

This situation brings with it, mixed emotions. 

I absolutely adore the feel of the pages that are covered with ink. I like to press down on them with my hand. When I do, I am rewarded with a satisfying bounce that you don’t get when you press on empty pages. 

Although I feel sad that this journal is almost full, I am also excited. It is time to go shopping for my new one.

No matter how odd or unfamiliar my example may seem to you, it is a concept you are intimately acquainted with. I’m talking about endings and beginnings.

They vary in size and importance, but you are surrounded by them constantly. One thing must stop before another one can start.

An example of this is your breathing. If you are inhaling, you can’t exhale. You need to stop taking air into your lungs before you can begin to release it. 

Sleep, meals, conversations, and walks are other examples of endings you are accustomed to. For the most part when these conclusions happen, you accept them easily. You are either ready to move on, or you understand you can do them again whenever you want.

Of course, there are some endings that are much more difficult because you don’t know when or if you will ever have that experience again.

This can be the case when you get a new job, move locations, or come to the end of a dream vacation. 

Perhaps the most final of all endings is death. Saying goodbye to a loved one knowing they won’t be part of your future on earth can be devastating. With elderly parents, I am keenly aware that this isn’t easy to navigate.

Regardless of the nature of the ending or how major or minor it is, the same principles apply. The ending is necessary for something new to occur.

There is nothing wrong with mourning an ending. It is part of the process of letting go. 

Difficulties arise when you aren’t willing or able to release whatever is coming to an end. Without a finish, it can be challenging to begin whatever is next for you. 

I’m seeing this a lot. 

I recognize that many endings are painful and need time to be mourned, but I also understand the importance of willingly letting go and moving forward.

If you find yourself faced with an ending, remember that you are also on the cusp of a beginning. 

Concentrate on your breathing for a few minutes. Fill your lungs and notice the slight pause that happens before you exhale.

If you resist letting the air out of your lungs for more than a few minutes, you will notice your body begin to feel uncomfortable. It wants you to move onto the next phase. It needs you to exhale.

If you can embrace endings, by understanding that they are making way for something new, you will find yourself in a better place to begin whatever is next. 

Recognize what you are releasing and the emotions that come with it. Honour these with forgiveness, compassion, and gratitude. Then choose to move forward into the beginning that is waiting for you.

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About the Author

Reen Rose is an experienced, informative, and engaging speaker, author, and educator. She has worked for over three decades in the world of education, teaching children and adults in Canada and England.

Research shows that happy people are better leaders, more successful, and healthier than their unhappy counterparts, and yet so many people still believe that happiness is a result of their circumstances.

Happiness is a choice. Reen’s presentations and workshops are designed to help you become robustly happy. This is her term for happiness that can withstand challenge and change.

Reen blends research-based expertise, storytelling, humour, and practical strategies to both inform and inspire. She is a Myers Briggs certified practitioner, a Microsoft Office certified trainer and a qualified and experienced teacher.

Email Reen at [email protected]

Check out her websites at www.ReenRose.com, or www.ModellingHappiness.com

The views expressed are strictly those of the author and not necessarily those of Castanet. Castanet does not warrant the contents.

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