Address bullying

My heart breaks for those in Tumbler Ridge. In 2016, I had the pleasure of doing my school practicum in Tumbler Ridge and I loved it there.

We are all talking about the victims (of Tuesday’s shoot in Tumbler Ridge) and so we should. But let’s also talk about the shooter, a person who started transitioning six years ago, dropped out of school four years ago and was the subject of multiple calls for mental health checks by the RCMP.

As a hard of hearing person, I grew up in Penticton in the 1990s and I was bullied to the point where I couldn't go half an hour without someone saying something mean to me. My mental health was very unstable back then. I hated everyone and everything and to this day I struggle with self-confidence and making friends.

I had dreams of beating up every person who targeted me and there were many. I get the anger. I have been there and have heard hear stories about people with disabilities or differences still being targeted by other people who have no understanding of what it’s like to have no control of their circumstances.

People feel isolated, feel hate and anger all the time. When nobody is around (counsellors, family, friends, teachers), you bottle it up until you explode.

I don't know what happened in Tumbler Ridge for (the alleged shooter Jesse Van Rootselaar, but I do know there isn't enough help for those who are bullied, especially in school. I hear stories, even today, about teenagers lured by other teens, into open spaces and beaten. I hear about kids getting bullied at school and teachers and school administrators turning a blind eye, blaming the victim and the victim committing suicide or turning to drugs or going to jail. There is no help for those people.

Everyone talks about anti bullying days. That's great. But in schools, are we doing anything about it? If your child is bullying another child are you doing anything about it? To the people doing the bullying, why are you doing that? Do you need help, yourself?

We need to talk about it. We need to stop the cycle (of bullying)—online, verbal and (physically) violent. For some kids, schools are their safety net and if they aren't safe in their schools, then what?

It’s time for a change. I hope something good comes out of this (shooting).

If you are the bully. Please stop. Ask yourself, why do you do that? Change before something happens you regret.

Alicia Ferri, Kelowna