The world's greatest fear

Sweaty palms, raggedy breath, nausea; no, not a COVID sufferer, but a dad about to give a toast to the bride. 

We don’t have to be addressing the nation on TV to feel the anxiety and dread that comes with the No. 1 fear, greater than that of dying, for many people.

Glossophobia is fear of public speaking, and is believed to affect up to 75% of people, according to Wikipedia.

Lucky for us Glossophobites, there is an easy and fun solution to dealing with that fear — Toastmasters International.

I have always been comfortable singing in front of hundreds of people, but I became paralyzed when I was in a room where people could see me up close. I started to avoid social engagements because this fear was so intense. That’s not a good situation for a performing artist continually looking for work.

I had heard about this group called Toastmasters. My mental picture of this club was a bunch of stuffy know-it-alls who were waiting to tear new members apart. Not surprisingly, it took me a few years to get up the courage to face my fears with such preconceived opinions.

I was surprised to find several chapters in just Kelowna, perhaps it wasn’t as bad as I thought. I picked an early meeting club, 6:45 am. 

Nothing could have prepared me for what I experienced. I was genuinely welcomed and put at ease. One hour and 15 minutes later, I had found a vaccine for what ailed me. The relief was palpable.

The cure took awhile, but Toastmasters was up to the task. 

Five years later, I was awarded my Distinguished Toastmaster Award, the highest honour Toastmasters International gives. It took 40 speeches, four leadership positions on our club’s board of directors, two area directorships, and countless hours of laughter, fun, and friendship. 

That was a long, long way from the shaking Sue who went to her first meeting.

My story isn’t unique. There have been thousands of people before me and I hope, will be after me. 

Toastmasters was started on March 24, 1905, in Bloomington, Ill. by Ralph C. Smedley while he was working at the YMCA. He saw a need in young men to be able to express themselves better and a club atmosphere helped their learning. 

He moved around the country for the next nine years with the YMCA association and this club continued to gain popularity wherever it went.

In 1930, it came to British Columbia, and became a non-profit organization in 1932 as Toastmasters International.

Even though women got the right to vote in 1918, it was a long 68 years before women were officially welcomed into Toastmasters. The year was 1973. Helen Blanchard, who had to first register as Homer Blanchard, pioneered women's membership. 

She became the first woman president of Toastmasters International. Thank you, Helen!

Toastmasters International is successful in eliminating public speaking fear because it has developed a four-point system that is fool proof if worked consistently.

It creates a safe environment 

Each club works on being welcoming and accepting while allowing people to grow at their own pace.

During my first days in my club, I witnessed a beautiful speech given by a member who had come faithfully each week for four years before he had the courage to speak. Everyone gave him a standing ovation with tears in our eyes for such a huge personal triumph. 

The Win-Win program  

Toastmasters believes in leadership. The club provides a mentor for each new member to help them through their first three speeches. The newbie now has a friend to approach and ask questions. The mentor is a member who learns leadership by helping the new member to face their fears and learn. Both members learn and grow.

Safe evaluations

Everything is evaluated in Toastmasters, each speech, planned or impromptu, and any job is analyzed on what was done well. A thoughtful and non-threatening “gift” is given for each individual’s personal growth. 

Listening skills are developed 

Listening skills are sharpened each week from giving evaluations. You must hear before you can analyze. The most valuable gift Toastmasters has given me is the ability to actively listen. 

Fear of being inadequate kept me from hearing what someone was saying and now I can hear their story.

In our club, we have had an author and illustrator come together to make a teaching workbook, supported charity drives, provided a learning ground for professional speakers, helped develop a TED Talk speaker and have helped prepare many members to speak to better at a wedding or work presentation.

It was through this sharing of talents that a fellow member dragged me, screaming and yelling, OK I exaggerate, to write this weekly column. He understood the passion I have for artists and the arts and has given me a forum to support them.

People come to Toastmasters International for a short while, a lifetime, or any amount of time in between.

If they keep coming, they are guaranteed to keep learning and get fearlessly better.

All you have to lose is your fear.

What are you waiting for?

This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.