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The Dad Vibe

I know why you two fight: Part 2

Nov 21, 2014 / 5:00 am

In part 1, we looked at the first reason why you two may fight, your protective self vs. your authentic self. Now I want to talk about the great Terry Real, best selling author and founder of the Relational Life Institute, who coined the term "core negative image (CNI)” as it...

I know why you two fight

Nov 7, 2014 / 5:00 am

I know exactly why you and your partner fight with each other. Sure, your fights might masquerade and manifest as arguments about money, the kids, the lack of sex, or who took out the garbage last, but that is not really what they are about. At the absolute root, it's about your...

Dads do it differently!

Oct 24, 2014 / 5:00 am

Dads do it differently. Not better. Not Worse. Just different. That was one of my main points in my keynote speech “What Dads Really Want…” which I delivered last week in beautiful Penticton, BC. My room was full of childcare service providers, moms, and actually, a great...

The day I lost my daughter

Sep 12, 2014 / 5:00 am

There is nothing better than Daddy-daughter night at the mall. It’s a night of nothing but holding hands, shopping, ice cream and “sometimes treats”, and laughing all the way. It was pure magic, until we hit the big department store. While we were looking at shiny new toys, I...

Talk to your kids for 7 Minutes?

Aug 15, 2014 / 5:00 am

I try to keep my writing light and interesting, but sometimes I preach. Today is a preaching day because I came across a very alarming study yesterday… According to this study, many parents spend less than 7 minutes a day in communication with their children. That is shocking,...

A stranger touched my child...

Jul 25, 2014 / 5:00 am

The Bad Touch: When a stranger Touched my little girl I tickle and wrestle with my little girl and my little boys too, when they initiate. They have granted me that privilege as a caring, loving father. I will not tickle and wrestle with your children. Aside from being wildly...

Bottles, breasts and erections

Jul 11, 2014 / 5:00 am

4 Things NOT to say to a Bottle Feeding Dad… I love breasts. Always have. Breasts feed babies. Sometimes... We have all heard the slogan “Breast is Best”. Heck, I lived that motto at every high school party in my awkward teenage years. But if breastfeeding...
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What Dads really want on Father's Day...

Jun 13, 2014 / 5:00 am

Forget Christmas, my birthday, or even Halloween - Father’s Day is my favourite day of the year. Not for the commercialism or gifts I may receive, but for this amazing opportunity I have been given: to be a father. Happy Father’s Day to all those men playing a significant role in...

Meet our baby boy Clarence...

May 16, 2014 / 5:00 am

"Some gal would giggle and I'd get red, And some guy'd laugh and I'd bust his head, I tell ya, life ain't easy for a boy named "Sue!” In the classic Johnny Cash song, “A Boy named Sue”, a father that wasn’t going to be around to raise his son,...

Daddy on a Pedestal, for now

May 2, 2014 / 5:00 am

When I was 13 years old, I heard someone screaming obscenities from our garage as I was coming up the front walk after school. I was afraid and uncomfortable, wondering who the angry man was in our garage. I timidly stuck my head in and saw my father standing there with a small electrical burn...

Your Mom is a lying witch!

Apr 18, 2014 / 5:00 am

I wrote this article in early February while in New Orleans at the Dad 2.0 summit: a gathering of influential dad writers, marketers, speakers, and bloggers. On the airport shuttle bus to the hotel, I witnessed something that made me sick to my stomach. While most people ride a shuttle bus in...

R we teaching our children 2 B dumb?

Apr 4, 2014 / 5:00 am

I don’t want to raise ungrateful kids. I don’t want to raise unhealthy kids. I don’t want to raise kids with low self-esteem. And after having dinner last month with internationally renowned children’s singer and advocate Raffi, I realized also I don’t want to...

You better than your Dad?

Mar 14, 2014 / 5:00 am

Of course you are right? You are more evolved that your dad – he was more “hands off”, harder to reach, more authoritarian than nurturer. You are more connected and involved with your kids, but are you really a better dad? How do we define that? “Better Dad”?...

My kid needs to suffer...

Jan 17, 2014 / 5:00 am

As parents, our natural born instinct is to protect and shelter our children from pain, harm, or any negative consequences. However, to grow and thrive, they need to suffer setbacks and failures to learn, and prepare for life. So the question shouldn’t be IF we should let our kids...

To find out or not to find out?

Jan 10, 2014 / 5:00 am

Last year was awesome. My Dad Vibe ‘tribe’ continues to grow and I want to quickly thank all of you for your support and sharing. How exciting to have an article go viral. I’m hoping 2014 will be even bigger. One thing is for sure, my family will be larger as we welcome, in...

You and your anus

Dec 13, 2013 / 5:00 am

Announcer Voice: “Welcome to another edition of “Starfish Sports. Here is your host, winner of 5 Buck-Eye News Hawk awards, Ben Dovermann!” Ben: “Good day sports fans, we are live on location with a COL network exclusive. Today, I am speaking with Jeff Hay, the newest...

Loving my red-headed stepchild...

Nov 29, 2013 / 5:00 am

This is a tough article to write as my vulnerabilities and weaknesses will be revealed. I have had the opportunity to work with other people’s children and treat them as my own through various jobs running a childcare centre, directing a summer camp, and years spent teaching and coaching....

God Bless the Lost Boys of Sudan

Nov 22, 2013 / 5:00 am

The “Lost Boys of Sudan” is a horrific story, both chilling and incredibly sad. Tragically enough, it’s also one of the most effective parenting tools I have ever found. In my never ending quest to help my children develop compassion and an attitude of gratitude, I stumbled...

Do you think you are better than me?

Nov 15, 2013 / 5:00 am

No, this question is not “You vs. Me” in a test of parenting skills. No, it is not a question to be asked between a stay-at-home dad and a working dad. This question is about your relationship with your spouse. This was a golden question that came up in a friend’s...

A kid to share a drink with!

Nov 8, 2013 / 5:00 am

I had time to kill waiting for a friend at a pub. I knew no one in this pub, yet sitting on that bar stool, on a cloudy Tuesday afternoon, I received one of the best pieces of parenting advice ever from the Irish gent sitting two bar stools away. Long story short, after awkward introductions,...



About the Author

Jeff Hay… is a Kelowna based writer, motivational speaker, parenting coach, and father of three. Along with writing for Castanet, Jeff also writes for the Huffington Post, the Good Men Project, and the National Fatherhood Initiative in the United States.  When he is not playing his favourite role of “DAD”, Jeff is speaking throughout Canada as a popular parenting educator and working on his website – www.thedadvibe.com and his parenting book for Dads, “Wait Till Your Father Gets Home!” Jeff dedicates his life’s work to improving the well-being of children by increasing the proportion of children growing up with involved, responsible, and committed fathers.

E-mail Jeff your thoughts or questions anytime at [email protected]

 




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The views expressed are strictly those of the author and not necessarily those of Castanet. Castanet presents its columns "as is" and does not warrant the contents.



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