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Random Rants

Babies don't come with instructions

Jan 10, 2015 / 5:00 am

Parenting is hard. The problem is, kids do not come with how-to manuals. I did ask for one but the doctor just shook his head and laughed. I'm not talking...

Happy Resolution-less New Year!

Dec 27, 2014 / 6:00 am

I don’t often give out advice, that’s worthy of following; however there is the odd time when I feel compelled to share a life strategy that may or...

You can never plan for a miracle

Dec 13, 2014 / 5:00 am

It was nearly Christmas, almost nineteen years ago, that I was pregnant with my first little miracle. I was reminded of this not long ago, as friends of mine...

In for a penny...in for a pound

Nov 29, 2014 / 5:00 am

Do you ever have an Oprah-esque (not sure that is a word....yet) moment when you can no longer reconcile your version of the truth with the cold hard slap in...

Failure to focus: my ADD brain

Nov 15, 2014 / 6:00 am

I need brain Drano..I don't know if there is such a thing but if there is I am going need to get some ASAP. Price is no object. Although it would be great...

Live and learn

Nov 1, 2014 / 5:00 am

Warning: The content of this column may not be appropriate for all readers We humans are rather intriguing bundles of DNA aren't we? I was thinking that...

The bad news: I'm not sick anymore

Oct 18, 2014 / 5:00 am

I have a feeling I am no longer cool. It is not yet official, but I have been informed by not one, but two of my children that my street cred is almost maxed...

If you don't have a plan

Oct 4, 2014 / 5:00 am

If you don’t have a plan…how would you know what you should have been? I am famous for the five year plan that runs into a huge snag about five...

The Universe loves to laugh...at me

Sep 20, 2014 / 5:00 am

Once again, my illusionary world, or as it is sometimes called, my delusionary world, just crashed into my reality like a bull in a china shop. I have always...

For whom does the school bell toll?

Sep 6, 2014 / 5:00 am

Okay, I'm confused. It's September right? I just double checked my calendar and I know I'm right about this much. There is still no need to test me...

Call a medic, I've woken but I can't get up

Aug 23, 2014 / 5:00 am

I almost had to call an ambulance when I woke up this morning. Okay, I exaggerate ... slightly. I do that sometimes. Have you ever been so sore that you...

Life is short...my blood pressure is what?

Aug 9, 2014 / 5:00 am

I haven't been thin since before I could spell thin. It's not that I am horrendously over weight, but there have been days when I have felt as if the...

A very unhappy birthday to me

Jul 26, 2014 / 5:00 am

It's almost my birthday. I couldn't be less thrilled. I'm not exactly a fan of my birthday. If possible, I would love to skip the day entirely. Why...

The day my GPS tried to kill me

Jul 12, 2014 / 5:00 am

I have the directional sense of a fruit fly in a windstorm. There have been times in my life when finding my way to an unfamiliar place has resulted in tears,...

Is it a swimsuit...or a cautionary tale?

Jun 28, 2014 / 5:00 am

Occasionally, I like to ponder things. Not the big things, like are we alone in the universe, or why it always rains about 12 hours after I wash my car. From...

The turtle people are coming

Jun 14, 2014 / 5:00 am

They are arriving en mass to partake in the annual ritual known as camping. I call them turtle people because they tow their houses, children, pets, cars,...

Grateful for my fortunate mistakes

May 24, 2014 / 5:00 am

I have a tendency to make the occasional mistake. Okay, it's out there; I'm not perfect. I hope I have not disillusioned anyone too much. Take a breath;...

The day peace and quiet ran away

May 17, 2014 / 5:00 am

Yesterday, I found peace and quiet. I was so excited and overcome that I put them in a safe place so that we could have a proper visit later, when I had a...

The weekend that technology forgot

May 10, 2014 / 5:00 am

Sometimes I think to myself, 'now that's a great idea. I should totally do that. In fact I can't wait to do that because it is going to be the start...

Call 911 - I'm busy being Zen!

May 3, 2014 / 5:00 am

The phone is ringing. I hate that. I’m sitting here trying to meditate … and this obnoxious trill invades my solace. How dare it? It’s like...

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