I hate cash and so should you!

I hate paper bills in my pockets (even though new Canadian bills are now actually plastic). The sound of my pockets jingling doesn't make my jolly. Any time I get stuck with $20 or more bucks in cash I feel the urge to run down to an ATM and deposit it into our account. Plastic money for me is a much better alternative to paper money, and when people say - "Well, cash is king!" all I want to say is - " I hate cash. Cash sucks! Cash is nothing but annoyance."

Cash is hard to track

I'm one of those weird people who actually track their family spending. That's right, instead of just tossing money left and right like your average rap musician, I actually keep track of every dollar our family spends. Yes, every dollar. In fact, every cent. I use Mint.Com to keep track of every single cent that leaves our account, and I give every dollar a mission to accomplish - whether it is to feed us, pay our bills, or to work hard for us in a form of investment. Call me a financial nerd but tracking our expenses and spending our money on purpose have been the main factors behind paying off our debts and increasing our net worth towards financial freedom.

Now, you try tracking your spending with cash - it's impossible and that's why I hate cash. As soon as I get stuck with cash for whatever reason, I can never figure out where it went. You pay for your lunch with a crisp $20 bill, and get a handful of change in return - you don't expect me to track my change, do you? What am I supposed to do, count the pennies? Ain't nobody got time for that.

Cash is very easy to spend

The traditional financial wisdom says that everybody should use cash because it hurts to use cash, and spending plastic money doesn't. Supposedly, you spend less with cash, but you spend like a drunken sailor with debit and credit cards buying puppies, iPods, and chewing gum. Let me be the first one (or millionth) to pop this fairy tale. Spending cash for me is absolutely painless, but I'll think twice before pulling out my debit card.

When I have a few $20 bills in my pocket, all of a sudden my pockets start to burn. Oh hey, I have money! I can spend it with impunity! It's literally like having free money. It doesn't register as money to me for some reason, and gets spent with Millennium Falcon speed (that means "fast" in case you've never seen Star Wars).

Debit and credit charges on the other hand always hurt. They'll show up in my bank transactions, they'll be automatically reflected in my budget, and they'll be the silent witnesses of my (sometimes sad) spending behavior. Heck, they'll silently judge me for my spending. There's no getting away from them, even if it's just few dollars.

Heck, my wife will know about them. " Hey honey, I see Burger King in transactions, I thought you've decided not to go there anymore?" Crap! Well, I guess we found what cash is good for - cheating on your diet.

 

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This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.