Ever notice how good we are at putting things off? Some form of, “You kick and scream and make a fuss and then you do it anyway. Why don’t you just do it in the first place?” is heard by most of us as kids. Things do not change much as we grow up either.

We decide this week the porch gets painted or that book read, and suddenly the basement has to be straightened. Or the deck painted. Or the clouds realigned in the sky. The strange part is that we can put off even the things we enjoy, as evidenced in the phrase about having to get caught up on one’s reading. When we finally get around to that, we do not want to put the book down. The psychology gurus surely have a diagnosis, something about creating hunger through postponing pleasure. Since they need fancy terminology for everything, they could name it High Procrastination Index, and perhaps even find a way to get that affliction to hold back wrong actions as well as it seems to hinder the right ones.

We need definitive psychobabble for other phenomena as well, two of which regard the customs of ironing mail and cutting meat. Yes, ironing mail. A grandmother was observed pressing a missive she had sealed into an envelope. Concerned questioning revealed that during the war, letters were scrutinized for possible information leaks, and if an envelope was too thick, it was confiscated. The fact that that war was 25 years into history had no bearing on the matter and every envelope that left the house felt the weight of the old cast iron.

The habit of whacking the ham in half before putting it into the roast pan regards another tradition. As the story goes, several generations of cooks cut their meat without knowing why, until finally someone thought to question a family elder. “The pan wasn’t big enough,” came elucidation. “So I made it fit.”

Habituation works with stupidity too. A mouse will go through a maze the wrong way but once, then the little rodent gets smart. People on the other hand will bang head continually into the same wall in case this time the wall gives up and disappears. Or at least gets the point and moves over. It has been said that insanity is defined as repetition of same behaviour in anticipation of different results. We need to get those little creatures to squeak out their navigational expertise.

-- lmg

Linda M. Gigliotti has 20 years experience helping people produce excellent writing. She offers tutorial in the preparation of writing assignments for students, and proofreading services for other users of the written word.

E-mail Linda at: Linda.Gigliotti@castanet.net  or call her office at 250-765-2221.