Kids – they thrive on routines, schedules, and boundaries – or at least that's what all the experts tell us. And it is true, I suppose. I know that my own children seem to have a better day when they know what we're doing, when we're following our routine and when the boundaries are consistent. But on the flip side, maybe it is ME who is having a better day and they're simply following my lead.

Take my son for example. He can sleep in his bed any which way he flops. He doesn't yet have the preconceived notion that his pillow should be at one end of the bed and his head on that pillow. If he wants to sleep diagonally, or start the night on one end and finish on the other, he will. And he'll still wake up happy. On the odd occasion that he is grumpy in the morning we might tease “oh did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed” but he just giggles because he doesn't yet know what that means.

He's this little boy who learns everything from us and the world around him. He scribbles over the lines on his coloring sheets without a care in the world, except maybe when his next snack time might be. In his world, the sky could be green if he wanted it to be and trees could be pink. And that's okay by him.

You see, he enjoys scribbling and coloring outside of the lines. Testing the boundaries, pushing the limits. It's how he learns and develops big, bold, black coloring sheets of his own by which to live.

We're the parents and instead of providing a blank paper by which to scribble, we give them guidelines and rules. Of course, many of these are for their own safety. Others are to instill values of respect, thoughtfulness, politeness and friendship. But sometimes I find I can get so focused on all the rules, all that teaching and parenting, that I forget that he's the one with the crayon. He's the one ready, willing and able to color his own picture.

Do you ever feel like you say 'don't do that', 'don't do this' and 'no' a little too often? It is easy to do. Raising kids is so enjoyable and heartwarming (that goes without saying, but I've said it nonetheless), but it is also tiring and we can be quick to lose our patience. We have our own ideals, goals and hopes for our children. We know what kind of kids we would like them to be. Probably polite, respectful, nice and self-confident are adjectives that make the list. Safe, might be another. Obedient, maybe? So we guide them and provide them with the outline to be that person.

I often think however, that even though we set boundaries and try to achieve consistency, that maybe we should try coloring outside the lines. In fact, in order to help my children be the people I know they are, in order for them to be the adjectives I hope others will continue to describe them with, I believe it is essential to break some of the rules (within reason, of course).

Skip bedtime every so often, read an extra story, paint blue trees and a purple sun, eat ice cream for breakfast once in a while and start dinner with dessert sometimes. It teaches kids flexibility. It allows them to experience what it feels like to literally live outside the lines of their coloring book without compromising their overall safety and well being.

Looking at my son in a peaceful sleep, diagonally on his bed, without a care in the world, I'm reminded that he's still learning the way. Soon enough he'll discover the right way to sleep on the bed and the right way to color a picture. But for now, while he's still learning, I've taken a cue from him, the little boy without any preconceived notions on the way things should be. It's refreshing and provides me with a new perspective on when to say 'no' and when to just let him be. So I resist the urge to adjust his posture, pick him up and rest his sleeping head on his superhero pillow. And I silently hope that he can always find such deep sleep and disregard for the conventions we inadvertently pass on that, when taken into the context of the big colourful world, don't matter at all.