Make Canada great again

Photo: CNN

So U.S. President Donald Trump does not like our “unfair” competition in the gas, oil, lumber and dairy markets, but he wants to work with Canada?

Sounds like Trump, but I have a plan.

This is a grand plan. I am the best at creating grand plans. Better than anybody else, and when I create a grand plan, I mean GRAND. Nobody does it better than me. Truly!

So here it is. If Trump wants a trade war, let's give it to him. 

My grand plan: 

• Send Tim Horton’s packing. It is unfair competition. It's an American company that poses as a Canadian historical icon. Shut the doors on all of them. Send them home.
• Close Starbucks too
• And Walmart.
• All these American giants that unfairly compete on Canadian soil. 
• Let's stop United Airlines, Delta Airlines and American Airlines from landing here. 
• Let's make sure that we remove all American programming from Canadian satellite and cable providers.
• Ban Google, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn from the Internet and let's support our homegrown businesses.

From now on Canada First. In every way. 

Let's go in heavy, guns loaded; best negotiators to the fore and we will be hard. Because we will fight for Canada.

Or we could just let it play out because so far he has barely done a single thing he has said he would. 

This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.