Life is better when shared

Think of some things you're really passionate about, things you do just for fun.

Watching movies, playing games, going for hikes, taking out the boat...

Now, what if they couldn't be shared with anyone and you had to do all of those things alone. Would they still be as much fun? Would you still enjoy them?

I'm willing to guess probably not nearly as much...

It's our community, our social glue that makes our experiences so fulfilling.

We venture out together and together; we enjoy the highs and lows of life connected to those we know will be there to support us. 

So why then do we so often force ourselves to go it alone when it comes to trying new things?

Don't adventure alone

When I'm attempting something new, my first instinct seems to be to dive in and take on the challenge by storm.

I feel a sense of eagerness and pride tackling a new project that I could perhaps stand as tall as others who have attempted such things before me. 

So often though, this is where I struggle most and before I know it, I'm wasting precious time floundering as my ego tries to withstand a healthy does of humility.

Inevitably, I will either admit I need some guidance or I will do what so many of us have done when the going gets tough, quit.

From my experience, especially this year attempting a new challenge every month, I've found it's the times where I can force myself off my high horse and attempt to connect with a broader community that I not only helping myself succeed, but, more importantly, enjoying the experience.

I found that just by speaking to people about their passions, I was able to discover so much about their field of expertise.

Once you find someone’s obsession, it's usually more difficult to get them to stop talking.

This can be an incredible resource when experimenting with new experiences. If you can find a community of people who have a shared passion for your new venture, then you'll find all the insight and support you'll ever need to concur it.

A failure to find community

This month's challenge — to read 10 books in one month — started off just as rocky as most of my others.

I rushed out on my own, bought a few books, and then blindly dove into my new challenge.

Quickly, I realized that the books I had chosen (although interesting) were not the best books for me.

Most were long-winded, non-fiction or challenging, classic literature that my grade school reading level struggled to keep up with.

Before long, I had fallen behind on my deadlines and reading began to overflow into my personal and professional life causing me to make sacrifices I wasn't interested in making.

I had fallen into the same trap with all my other challenges. I had blindly ventured out on my own and faltered.

I had failed to connect with a community of supporters; the passionate people who could help steer me in the right direction and offer guidance.

Every niche has a community, you just need to find yours.

Finally, I headed straight for what I imagined would be the source of the local reading community, the independent bookstores. Both the used book store, High Browse 2nd Hand Books, and the local book shop, (Mosaic Books, offered me sage advice about the world of deeper reading.

Both shared their optimism about my challenge and offered constructive criticism of my questionable selections.

I finished my pursuit for a literary community by venturing into the local library (something I never thought I would do after grade school).

Instead of finding a cranky old librarian and walls of encyclopedias I recalled from my youth, the library was full of passionate people who were happy to help.

Discovering more than guidance

The most fortunate part of my new-found community wasn't just the help they offered or the expertise they shared, but the connection I made with the people I talked to.

It was their passion for reading, learning and story telling that got me recharged and refocused. It was the relationships that I built that made the struggles I'd been having with reading seem that much less challenging.

I've encountered this over and over again with challenge after challenge.

Whether it was cooking, mindfulness, vegetarianism or swimming, each specialty had its own unique community and it wasn't until I ventured into them and was able to tap into their shared enthusiasm and support that I really felt like I was able to enjoy the experiences.

My lesson from all of this comes down to a simple ideal, that no matter what you want to do, do it with people who love to do it too.

Only then will you truly appreciate the journey and find the enjoyment you seek.

Check my blog to see my book reviews for each of my 10 books, interviews and even more content from throughout the month.

This article is written by or on behalf of an outsourced columnist and does not necessarily reflect the views of Castanet.