Once upon a time, I woke to my alarm playing a sad song on the radio, kindly reminding me of a certain ex-Rex. The sadness that came over me (at the time) was a precursor of the rest of the day – last minute cancellations, unseasonably cold weather, spilled coffee, and more bad memories of ex-Rex (how nice!). Our sense of sound is a powerful invocation of memory, so why not use it to our advantage?
I save my preferred motivational or uplifting songs for easy access on my iPod so I can begin each day on the right note. When I listen to a song that makes me smile, sing in the shower, or dance in the kitchen, the rest of my day goes a little more serendipitously. An easy flow accompanies a lively stream of music and generates the feel good vibes we love.
Music is very personal, so choose wisely. Lyrics and beats that speak to your inner drummer raise your energy level for any task. My musical choices range from Jazz/Blues for relaxation and cooking; Classical for an inspiring accompaniment to creative pursuits, Rap/Pop for running, and Spa/New Age sounds for meditation. Yes, sometimes the meditation turns into a fabulous nap, and that feels good too!
Suggested ‘Feel Good’ tunes:
- I Got A Feeling by The Black Eyed Peas
- Beautiful Day by U2
- Happy by Pharrell Williams
- Tub Thumping by Chumbawumba
- We Are The Champions by Queen
- Break My Stride by Matthew Wilder
- Life’s What You Make It by Talk Talk
- Hey Beautiful Day by Bedouin Soundclash
- Walking On Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves
- Lust For Life by Iggy Pop
- Don’t Worry Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin
- Celebration by Kool and The Gang
- All I Wanna Do by Sheryl Crow
- Lovely Day by Bill Withers
- Footloose by Kenny Loggins
- Song 2 by Blur
- Feel Good Inc. by Gorillaz
- Get Up Stand Up by Bob Marley
- What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong
Turn off that sad, angst laden song and plug into pure energy. Discover songs that sing to your soul on YouTube, iTunes, or in any music store. You’ll be sidewalk dancing your way to good vibrations (and maybe some new friends?) in no time. On that note, watch the video below and let the carefree rhythm move you:
Growing up, I never gave much thought to my value system or the value systems of friends I spent time with. Looking back, I think if I had, it may have saved me a lot of grief. However, hindsight is nearly perfect and I’ve learned the importance of connecting with like-minded souls. Think about it – how much better does your life flow when you are laughing, working, and playing with someone who shares your goals and interests? How do you feel after spending time with someone who disagrees with everything you believe in or belittles all of your accomplishments? Not so good; maybe even depressed or angry enough to throw things. Connecting with people who support, nurture, and appreciate your unique gifts and who inspire you to feel the same towards them feels entirely different, yes?
You can’t choose your family growing up, but you are free to choose your friends, potential mate(s), and if you’re fortunate, co-workers. I witness many people miserable and complaining because they are ‘stuck’ with a spouse who does not share in their value system. We see this all around us – individuals who choose a mate who smokes when they do not, who is a couch potato to their marathon lifestyle, who is carnivorous to their veganism. I’m not promoting a less tolerant approach to the world, but taking part in the things you love to do with others who share the same passion certainly brings more happiness, peace of mind, and positive reinforcement to your own achievements.
My fascination with murder mysteries and the psychology of what drives people to make poor choices puts a spotlight on values. Quite often it boils down to surrounding yourself with people that maintain clear value systems – perhaps values like a reverence for life or a clear understanding that stealing from others is not cool! Nothing fascinates me more than watching someone make horrific mistakes, and how they were caught, or proven guilty. Not because I enjoy watching the misfortune of others, but because it becomes clear how many of these people may have avoided a lifetime prison sentence by surrounding themselves with people who had better judgment and values. Yes, everyone has personal responsibility, but sometimes those who are lost simply need a little guidance in the right direction in order to avoid catastrophic life decisions. Over and over again, I’ve watched people being convinced, manipulated, or talked into doing things they never could have imagined by befriending the wrong person or groups.
It becomes clear when you view the actions of those around you and review your past mistakes. You may see where you adopted similar habits and beliefs that are not true to you. Surrounding yourself with people who inspire, support, or encourage you along your life path may make the difference between failure and success in many areas of your life. Olympic medalists and successful entrepreneurs often did not reach their goals without the love, support, and hard work of those around them. Become aware of your own values and what is most important to you, from optimal health to ethical business success. Choose your friends, co-workers, and life mates wisely. It may help avoid a long term jail sentence!
“Fear Controls. Love Sets You Free.” This quote applies to all areas of life where fear prevents us from achieving our goals, dreams, and facing challenges that take us through to increased self-confidence, moments of blinding happiness, and deep peace of mind. Feed your fears and they will make your world a very small place indeed. Feed your joys and your world will expand with possibilities and great success.
Recognizing our own fears requires self-awareness. For example:
- Fear of success makes a creative person jump from one activity to another instead of honing in on the one activity they excel at and love.
- Fear of social situations prevents a shy person from venturing out; stuck in a rut of playing video games instead of establishing what could develop into meaningful new friendships.
- Fear of growing old keeps many people hopelessly addicted to the next great ‘miracle’ cream or ‘health’ concoction, spending all their money and time on plastic surgery and gym memberships. Instead of accepting the wisdom and gifts of growing old, they fight it every step of the way.
- Fear of failure prevents some from trying a new sport or career that may bring them into alignment with their true values.
- Fear of not being accepted causes an individual to bend over backwards in an attempt to please others instead of pleasing themselves, leaving them feeling empty and wanting.
Fear controls, giving ego desires priority over soul needs. Fear feeds ego through material goods, vanity, and self-centeredness. Love feeds our true desires for taking risks, connecting with others, and creating. New adventures and positive action nourish our minds with great wisdom, creating a ‘can do’ attitude.
Love is letting go of fear and embracing faith and trust in yourself and others, giving more smiles and hugs, expressing gratitude, and making connections in your community in whatever way is meaningful to you that effects positive action or change. Love is truth, wisdom, compassion, and faith in action. Love is expansive, in endless supply, energizing, and always feels good.
Fear is jealousy, anger, envy, and hatred in action. It contracts, stops you from growing and moving forward, and doesn’t feel good unless you move through it to positive action. Check in with your feelings often – they are an accurate guide.
“I can’t afford to do that.”
“That’s too complicated to try.”
“They won’t hire me without a degree.”
“I’m too old to do that.”
“I don’t deserve to be with someone that beautiful.”
“My ideas are lame.”
“I’m not talented enough.”
“I’m open to trying new things.”
“Once I start this, everything will fall into place beautifully.”
“What can I do to help make things better?”
“Yes, I can!”
“I can learn new skills no matter what my age is.”
“I will continue to work through this because I want to accomplish the goal ahead.”
Love believes in possibilities. Time to squash fear like the cockroach it is and choose the love that transforms your caterpillar into a butterfly! Tune into your heart needs through meditation, exercise, creativity, journalling, or reading the wisdom of others who have made their dreams a reality. Whether you believe in love or fear, it will be your experience. Choose wisely; choose what feels good in 2014.
The first time I viewed Kate Bush’s video “The Sensual World”, it struck a chord with me (check it out on YouTube). We have five senses – touch, taste, smell, sight, sound – but how many do we fully experience daily? Are you immersed in the joy of all you can touch, the flavours of what you eat, the subtle scents perforating the air, the sights around you, and what you hear? Life is a sensual adventure, if you choose to dance it that way.
Touch seems to be out of vogue, unless you’re a touch pad or phone. In our germ-phobic culture, hand shaking is almost cringed upon. Personally, fist bumping or sneezing into my elbow is not my thing. I learned how to wash my hands when I was three and we have immune systems for a reason. But seriously, if you hug at least one person a day, you’re likely to destroy any virus due to the warmth and intimacy a hug brings to your sense of well-being. Violence permeates our media, culture, and entertainment. Everyone could use a good hug.
Hiking the trails in the Okanagan offers an opportunity to listen to nature. People who are sensitive to constant noise surrounding us can take a vacation by noticing what they hear when it is quiet. Once I’ve shut off the incessant noise pollution in my head, I listen to the breeze rustling leaves, birds singing, the silence of no vehicle or electronics buzzing, and the satisfying crunch of dead leaves underfoot. It’s like a breath of fresh air. Alternatively, marinating in the hustle and bustle of city lights and shoppers is another feast for the senses.
The December holiday season is deliciously sensation-filled, and an ideal time to awaken your senses:
- Inhale the scent of a citrusy mandarin orange, a minty fudge candy, or a fresh swag of pine – personal favourites that offset my Boston Terrier gassing us out of the living area.
- Brew a decadent hot chocolate with Irish Cream or Kahlua, topped with a generous dose of real whipped cream, sit back and watch the snowflakes swirl like you did when you were little and had all day to daydream.
- Put on headphones and enjoy a Christmas symphony or old school Christmas songs (Bing Crosby and Johnny Mathis are good choices) and let the crooning take you back to Christmas memories of yesterday; hopefully not that time the Christmas tree fell over immediately after you placed the last decoration. Yeah, it happened.
- Go for an evening walk to see your neighbourhood Christmas lights and listen to the crunch of fresh snow underfoot, along with the silence of the night. Or choose another area if yours is filled with large, muffler-less trucks continually roaring by.
- Visit a skating rink and watch adorable toddlers learn to skate for the first time. Remember fondly that first time your skate pick caught on the ice and you had your very first bloody nose from the ensuing face-plant.
- Indulge in Eggnog and Gingerbread – guiltlessly and joyfully, like the little girl I saw in a coffee shop recently, out on a date with her Dad. The glee on her face when her hot drink piled high with whipped cream and chocolate drizzle arrived was priceless.
- Meditate on the lights of the Christmas tree. Forget about the Christmas to-do list until next year.
- Have a meaningful conversation with a homeless person who asks you for change. Instead of avoiding eye contact and rushing by, look them in the eye and smile. Fulfil the need of someone who is simply looking for a little bit of warmth over the holidays. Ah, there’s that heart you forgot you had, Grinchy!
- Bring friends over to share dinner, drinks, and a night of laughter – avoid any discussions involving work or politics as this is sure to put everyone to sleep.
- Hold hands and give hugs away. Every day. Whether they want it or not.
- Gather friends or family to tour a new neighbourhood and sing Christmas carols at the top of your lungs. Have a competition for worst caroler. Feel good for a change for losing.
- Snuggle in front of a crackling fireplace and absorb the heat. The Yule log on cable will also do in a pinch. Big screen TVs really give off the heat, and all the stoking is left up to TV guy.
- Share your favourite Christmas stories with loved ones. Marvel over how differently your brother remembers the snowball fight where you pelted him in the head and made him cry. Yes, I’m pretty sure that’s how it went down.
- Wrap up in the warmest, softest, thickest blanket you have and simply stare at the tree or candlelight. Fall into a deep nap like the bears do because hibernation is actually a pretty brilliant concept when it’s freezing outside.
When you practice focusing your attention on what sensation you’re experiencing in the moment, it enriches your world. Our senses can generate long forgotten memories, extraordinary creativity, and deep inner satisfaction. Feel, inhale, listen, taste, really look at your surroundings – feels good! Have a Merry one!
Read more Feel Good articles
- Wickedly good Nov 3
- Life on purpose Oct 4
- Transformational books Sep 6
- Turning lemons into wine! Jul 26
- Sweet associations Jun 22
- A taste of the good life May 19
- Nostalgia Apr 21
- Extremely easy measures Mar 19
- Fake lives Feb 17
- Random acts of goodness Jan 13
- Mentors Nov 17
- Sanctuary Sep 30
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